My emotional high was now crashing and the adrenaline was now fading. Iwas now quickly becoming much more subdued and considerably lessoutgoing. I became stunted in my conversation and let Jake do most of thetalking for us. I periodically looked into his eyes and smiled, but Itried not to get too emotional with him. I was fighting my internaldesire to be Jake's girl.When the meal and the speeches ended the Bride and Groom moved to center-stage for their fist official dance. Shortly after that many of the otherguests made their way onto the dance floor.In an attempt to be both formal and cute, Jake reached for my hand, thenasked "May I have this dance with my Cinderella?"I thought his question was sort of humorous, because I did feel a lotlike Cinderella. I was dressed for the ball, unlike I had ever beenbefore and I would soon be transforming back to my former secretiveexistence. I could not turn down his request even though it would take mefurther into his lair. I wanted him to. “I’m not going to have a job with you,” I said. “That leaves me without a source of income. I have bills to pay. You told me I didn’t qualify for short-term disability. I doubt the insurance companies are going to foot the bill for all the therapy you seem to think I’ll require. Even if they do, I’ll have to meet the co-pays and things like that.”“I’ll pay for that,” Liz said.“No,” I replied. I was getting good at that word – even if using it seemed like a fruitless endeavor.“This is why I wanted to wait for a little while to talk about this,” Liz said. “You’re on so many painkillers that you can’t see reason.”“I’m not on painkillers,” I replied. “I cut back to half on Wednesday and to a third yesterday. I haven’t taken one in ... nine or 10 hours ... and I’m fine.”“You stopped taking your medication?” Liz asked, lifting off the desk and staring at me like I was a second-grade student that had gotten caught talking in class.“I cut it back,” I said.“So you’re a fucking doctor now?” Liz.
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